Never Sleeps Network

Nestled somewhere between stand-up comedy and storytelling, ‘You Better DON’T!’ is a weekly(ish) seven(ish)-minute podcast featuring unscripted banter and musings from award-winning comedians Lisa Schwartzman and Steven Shehori. Subscribe to us on iTunes, Stitcher, Zune, Tunein, or Miro. Oh, and for the love of balls tell your friends.

Lisa and Steven unveil a new kind of courting for the 21st century.

Lisa and Steven express their disappointment in serial killers who’ve embraced the most repugnant of the deadly sins: sloth.

Lisa drops a bold new business idea on Steven. Meanwhile, Steven concedes his unusually high IQ ain’t all it’s cracked up to be.

Lisa makes Steven uncomfortable with her theory on human anatomy. (You can’t un-hear it — you’ve been warned.) Shortly afterward, the two of them solve sexism. Bonus: Jews!

Lisa asks the Good Lord for assistance, then dismisses the miracle after it’s immediately granted. Bonus: Steven schools Lisa (a former Soviet) on the difference between parades and protests.

So guess what Lisa craves more than anything in the world? This episode’s title is a pretty big hint, brah.

Lisa gives Steven the what-for over his attention deficit disorder. Steven outs Lisa as a Mean Girl.

While in a Russian forest, Lisa Forrest Gumps herself into nearly getting her forest humped. (If you catch her drift.) Also, fifth grade Steven narrowly avoids being raised by the KGB.

Lisa and Steven adore dogs. Except when they’ve had to put them down or accidentally eat them.

Lisa and Steven grind their gears on 3D printing, pilots, and overcompensating motorcycle owners. Special guest star: Jacob the Toddler! #TeamJacob